Felicia and Ryon play games for girls Barbie Race & Ride and Mary-Kate and Ashley's Winner's Circle.
|Barbie Race & Ride|
|Published||Mattel Media, 1999|
|Mary-Kate and Ashley's Winner's Circle|
|Published||Club Acclaim, 2001|
|Executive producers||Felicia Day
|Music||Jason Charles Miller|
|Production assistant||Annie Liu|
|Stats (as of January 12, 2020)|
|First aired||April 21, 2014|
Barbie Race & Ride
Ryon: "Oh, this is going to be so good. This looks like an episode of Robot Chicken. It's like Optimus Prime is gonna come around."
Ryon, as Barbie: "'Ranch dressing is all I eat, along with ice cubes and iceberg lettuce. We have to find the ranch dressing.'"
Felicia, looking at the game settings: "'Parental settings'? Is this for nudity??"
Ryon: "We don't want to see Barbie's nippleless breasts or smooth—"
Felicia: "'Vibrating function'?? Okay, wait!"
Ryon: "Is that under the parental options?"
Felicia: "YES!! It's under the parental options to have—! We gotta turn vibrating—"
Ryon: "It can't be! It can't be!"
Felicia: "Turn it on. Turn it on."
Ryon: "Fuck yeah, we'll turn it on."
Barbie, in game: "Ha ha, she loves to give me kisses, and she really likes to jump!"
Felicia: "I don't trust her voice when she did that little giggle."
Ryon: "Tee hee! Kisses! Horses have long tongues! Hee hee!"
Felicia, browsing list of horse names: "How many are there? 'Ginger', 'Lily', 'Lady'—"
Ryon: "This game is off the HOOK! It's off the HOOK, yo! [misreads Poppy] 'Poopy'??"
Ryon: "It's close enough!"
Ryon, reading name: "'Sassy'? Okay"
Game, reading selected name: "Sassy! Shadow! Silver! Shad— Sassy!"
Ryon: "Also, these are the same names in the stripper simulator. 'What do you want to name your stripper?'"
Ryon: "This looks like the title card for a porno. And the name [The Riding Lesson] also."
Felicia: "The Riding Lesson. Sassy and Poppy star in The Riding Lesson."
Barbie: "Looks like some kind of game!"
Ryon, as Barbie: "'Looks like the grave stones of small children!'"
Felicia: "Well, can I go in the cave? Could I explore? No, you gotta stay on the straight and narrow, little girl. Don't explore! Don't have any freedom! We're gonna give you a perception of freedom and free will, but really you should do what your parents say."
Felicia: "Okay, first there's a beaver puzzle, then we're finding the right holes."
Ryon: "I'd be good at that."
Mary Kate and Ashley's Winner's Circle
Felicia: "Just tell me where to go, guys."
Off-camera: "There's dots on the ground!!"
Off-camera: "Where there are dots on the ground."
Felicia: "Right here!"
Ryon: "There's really no other way to put it more clearly than 'there's dots on the ground.'"
Felicia: "Alright, turn around."
Ryon, singing: "Turn arouuund. Every little horse—"
Ryon: "Why are you swerving at the last second? Your horse is like, 'Uh-UH, bitch! Ain't all the carrots in the world gonna make me jump over that motherfucker."
Ryon: "So, um, there's 46 gates left. Do you want to call it right now?"
Felicia: "Guys, if there are other games you would like us to play in the future—"
Ryon: "Any horse-related games—"
Felicia: "Any horse-related games that you would recommend that would further Ryon's pleasure of jumping through, ya know, gates and shit—"
Ryon: "Or any other stars of Full House that made video games—"
Felicia: "If there is a John Stamos video game—"
Ryon: "Ooh. Yeah, leave it in the comments."
Felicia: "I wanna play that."
Barbie Race & Ride
- Felicia: "Poppy" ("It's close enough [to Poopy]!")
- Ryon: "Sassy"
Mary-Kate and Ashley's Winner's Circle
- Felicia: "Peupi"
Felicia: "2 identical thumbs up"
Ryon: "2 cracked-out thumbs up"
|0:00||"This week" preview|
|0:59||Barbie Race & Ride begins|
|7:56||Mary-Kate and Ashley's Winner's Circle begins|
|8:40||"Blague de Caca of the week"|
|12:43||"Catch of the week"|
|13:35||Rating and outro|
- Felicia tells a story of her relation to Mary-Kate and Ashley at the top of their game segment: "One of my very first auditions was in the summer of 2001 when this particular game probably came out, I auditioned four times for this movie to be their best friend, for Mary-Kate and Ashley and their mom. The other girl got it. But, true story, the other girl broke her leg severely in a snow mobile accident during filming, so I was like, glad I didn't take that job. Glad they didn't wanna be my friend."
- Barbie Race & Ride and Mary-Kate and Ashley's Winner's Circle - Retro Let's Play: Co-Optitude Ep 42 on YouTube
- Barbie Race & Ride on Wikipedia
- List of Mary-Kate and Ashley video games on Wikipedia
- Bonnie Tyler - Total Eclipse of the Heart (Video) on YouTube
- Full House on Wikipedia
- John Stamos on Wikipedia