Felicia and Ryon play Super Mario Kart.
|Super Mario Kart|
|Executive producers||Felicia Day
|Music||Jason Charles Miller|
|Production assistant||Annie Liu|
|Stats (as of January 12, 2020)|
|First aired||September 9, 2013|
Felicia: "But, you know what? We're gonna try to amuse you with our enjoyment, which probably won't work."
Felicia: "You like our misery and ignorance."
Ryon: "You'll have to enjoy my completely whupping her ass instead."
Ryon: "It's a good substitute."
Felicia: "I hope you— I hope you die in a fire. In— On the screen."
Ryon: "Wow. That's really grim."
Felicia: "What are we gonna do with it?"
Ryon: "We're gonna play it! We're gonna play this game!"
Felicia: "Dude, that's not your catch—"
Ryon: "Let's put this game in the console and turn the console on!"
Felicia: "No, you have to say your catchphrase."
Ryon: "Let's put this game in the console and power it up! Let's power this game up!"
Felicia: "That's not it, man! D— Do it! [grabs cartridge] Let's play this fucker!"
Felicia: "I feel like at the end, this is just the preamble to fighting to the death in a jousting match. You know what I'm saying? Like, this is the Hunger Games of this world."
Felicia: "I totally just lapped the little turtle dude. What's his name? Koopa?"
Ryon: "King Koops?"
Felicia: "No, the fucking— What is the turtle's name? I'm blanking now, I'm so excited I'm in first place."
Felicia: "No, not Bowser."
Ryon: "No, king of the Koopas, it's Bowser."
Felicia: "The old turtle."
Ryon: "No, it's Bowser."
Felicia: "It's not Bowser, man, I know Bowser."
Ryon: "The king, Bowser."
Felicia: "I'm not a fucking stupid bitch."
Ryon: "Well, that's up to debate."
Ryon: "I like this. Look at that. Wow, three seconds behind. That's like an eternity. You realize that's like an eternity when you're driving?"
Felicia: "You're such a shit talker."
Felicia: "Shut up."
Ryon: "Fun fact."
Felicia: "Shut up, let's just go."
Felicia: "You let Donkey Kong in his tight little ass crack onesie beat you? Really?"
Ryon: "Donkey Kong has a tight little ass crack?"
Felicia: "Well, look at him. It's going up his crack."
Ryon: "You can't even fit a toothpick in there."
Felicia: "That is a French-cut onesie, okay? It's going up his butt when he's sitting down, okay?"
Felicia, in bad Italian accent: "Would you like-a a mushroom-a?"
Ryon: "Oh wow, that's so ethnically wrong. I don't even know what to say to that."
Felicia: "Maybe eat-a some spaghetti, some ravioli!"
Ryon: "Oh wow, just the worst. Really bad."
Felicia: "Hey-a Luigi, how's it a-going? It's fun up here in first-a place!"
Ryon: "God, you're fired, Luigi."
Felicia, in bad Italian accent: "Maybe you should open a pizza parlor, you stupid fuck!"
Felicia: "Toad, you're a pretty little Toad. You are. You can grow on any rock you [gets hit with turtle shell] WAAH, WHO THE FUCK HIT ME!?"
Felicia: "Boom. NOOO!!"
Ryon: "Oh no, did something go bad? Did something go awry!? Did something go awry!?"
Felicia: "Pull it out, Toad. Come on, little mushroom. You're not a fungus, you're a fungi."
Ryon: "Oh god. Just stop that."
Felicia: "No, you're not a vegetable. That's was the joke, if you're a vegetable."
Ryon: "You just fucked up the stupidest joke in the world."
Ryon: "Luigi, I didn't mean all that stuff I said. I was just frustrated. I'm trying to coach a strong team."
Felicia, crossing lap line: "Oh, I'm still going! God dammit. I thought I was done."
Ryon, in bad Italian accent: "I chop-a that mushroom up and put it on the pizza! Chop-a the mushroom into bits!"
Felicia, trying to get Ryon's finger out of her face: "Get your finger— I don't know where it's been. It smells like chicken."
Ryon, in bad Italian accent: "What a beautiful sight. Hodor. Hodor!"
Ryon: "'Great race,' indeed. That was a story of a fall from grace, and then redemption, and ultimate triumph. Great race, indeed."
Felicia: "20 mushrooms."
Ryon: "22 mushrooms heads."
|0:00||"This week" preview|
|12:14||"Joke of the Week"|
|15:17||Rating and outro|
- Felicia Day and Ryon Day Play Super Mario Kart: Co-Optitude Episode 14 on YouTube
- Super Mario Kart on Wikipedia