Episode 48

Felicia and Ryon play Super Monkey Ball 2.

Super Monkey Ball 2

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Platform	GameCube
Published	Sega, 2002
Credits
Hosts	Felicia Day Ryon Day
Director of cinematography	Omer Ganai
Executive producers	Felicia Day Sheri Bryant
Editing	Andrew Jewell
Graphics	Steven Sprinkles
Music	Jason Charles Miller
Production assistant	Annie Liu
Stats (as of January 12, 2020)
First aired	June 2, 2014
Duration	14:11
Views	145,213
Likes	3,894
Comments	240

Quotes

Ryon: "Hi, everybody. It's Co-Optitude time again."

Felicia: "Co-Optitude is a show where I play retro games— or games— Let's just get rid of the retro thing. Because people are getting defensive because it makes them feel old to have your childhood game be retro."

Ryon: "Yet neither are they new. So we got— Where we play tweener games for your entertainment!"

Felicia, laughing: "What's a tweener?"

Ryon: "Tweener. It's the awkward donkey years. These are games that have all gangly limbs and budding breasts, and they're just starting to sprout hair in curious places."

Felicia: "Let's not talk about this! This is not—"

Ryon: "It happens to every game."

Ryon: "This is a little monkey with Pac Man eyes and cinnamon roll ears who has big dreams of piloting a ball around the course."

Felicia: "Why does he have cinnamon roll ears? That so— I'm never going to be able to—"

Ryon: "I don't know. If you think you know why the monkey has cinnamon roll ears, leave a comment!"

Felicia: "Oh look. We're gonna have to look at monkey ass this whole episode?"

Ryon, of banana: "Oh, it's a Dole! I have a hankering for a Dole banana! I wonder why. Just, no other banana will do."

Felicia: "WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE DOING! I'm so angry."

Ryon: "That's part of the fun of discovery, so—"

Felicia: "It's not fun for anyone."

Ryon: "You're gonna run out of time, and it's gonna be so funny when you almost get to— [Felicia falls off edge] Bye!"

Felicia: "AAAH!"

Ryon: "How could you be going like 3 miles an hour and still wreck?"

Felicia: "'Cause I needed that Dole banana!"

Ryon: "When I feel a need for some energy, I look to Dole bananas!"

Ryon: "Look. They keep accelerating forever. Like, monkeys will keep accelerating until they reach the speed of light."

Felicia: "You know, if they go fast enough they can bore to the center of the earth."

Ryon: "You were really gleaming the cube there!"

Ryon: "You're going 70 miles an hour. And you're just kinda rattling around in your ball too."

Felicia: "There's probably puke in there. Just like banana shit and it's all tossed around in there."

Ryon: "Boy, that baby's mom is gonna have to explain the bruises. 'Oh, he just fell down some stairs. He's so clumsy, that baby.'"

Ryon: "Dole is not going to renew this monkey's promotional contract."

Ryon: "If the objective of this game was to miss platforms and fall off platforms, we would be the world's best players."

Felicia: "We are literally Monkey Ball champions."

Ryon: "At this point, you're just guilty of repeated child abuse. We're gonna call CPS and take your monkey away."

Ryon: "Okay, it's your time to shine. [monkey falls off edge] No it's not."

Felicia: "Once you're in the hole you can't do anything else!"

Ryon: "I'll say."

Felicia: "I like Chiquita bananas better, just 'cause I like—"

Ryon: "SHHHH! Shhh! Cut that out! That can't get out."

Felicia: "I just like supporting a woman. 'Cause you know that a woman owns that banana company."

Ryon, laughing: "What?"

Felicia: "It's Carmen Miranda! Remember that woman? She owns that banana company."

Ryon: "I think Donkey Kong would eat these fuckers for lunch."

Felicia: "I think he'd date me. Like this character."

Ryon: "Um, he would hit it and quit it. If Donkey Kong were on a TV show, it would be Jersey Shore. Did you know that?"

Felicia: "Do they live in their bubble or they get out of their bubble and then have to go in and compete? You know what I'm saying?"

Ryon: "I think that if they do really well, their master lets them out of their bubble briefly, only to put them back in the next morning."

Felicia, seemingly satisfied with that answer: "Okay."

Felicia, as Ryon does Coaster level: "If you get this on the first try I'm gonna kill you."

Ryon: "Oh, now I have a goal to reach for."

Felicia: "It was an accident you made it last time."

Ryon: "Shut the fuck up. Boy, if I get it this time, [the monkey reaches finish line] that'd be amazing, wouldn't it? Wouldn't that be incredible if I got it the very first time?"

Felicia, laughing: "I hate you so much! I hate you so much! I hate you! I HATE YOU!"

Ryon: "I got two banana bunches, too!"

Felicia: "I HATE YOU!"

Ryon: "There's a lot of animal torture themed games, aren't there?"

Felicia: "That's what I'm saying. If you put a small child— If this was Baby in a Ball, people would not be happy."

Ryon, laughing: "Like you're throwing babies off cliffs and such?"

Felicia: "Think about that Ally McBeal baby inside a ball—"

Ryon: "God, that's a deep cut. Jesus Christ. Nobody remembers that shit."

Felicia, about game mode: "It looks like we might be out of the ball, which I think is—"

Ryon: "'Let's think out of the ball.' That's what these monkeys say when they're trying to think up an idea."

Ryon: "I'm gonna be Gongon again."

Felicia: "You're much more of a Gongon than an Aiai. If you did a horoscope, like, 'Which monkey ball are you?'"

Character names

There wasn't an option to name your characters, but the high score screen let you enter your name.

Ryon: "FFFFFF"

Other names seen on the leaderboard which may be Ryon's character:

"TAINTE"
"POPIGG"

Rating

Felicia: "4 tormented monkeys in balls"

Ryon: "3 Sarah McLachlan songs over footage of tortured monkeys"

Cue points

0:00	"This week" preview
0:12	Opening theme
0:21	Host intro
1:47	Game begins
6:38	"Participation Award of the Week"
13:40	Rating and outro
14:01	End card/promo
14:10	Closing theme
14:11	End video

Gallery

Felicia and Ryon introducing the episode
Ryon explaining what a tweener is, with a photo of Ryon and Felicia as (presumably) tweeners
Felicia begging Ryon to stop describing tweeners' awkward body changes
The Super Monkey Ball 2 game box
Scene transition with Ryon as a monkey
One of Felicia's many failures at the Coaster course
Disclaimer as Felicia explains Carmen Miranda runs Chiquita
Felicia finally beating the Coaster level
Ryon's monkey "doing the Urkel"
Ryon beating Coaster on his first try, and Felicia furious about it
The Ally McBeal baby
Scene transition with Felicia as a monkey