Episode 75

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Felicia and Ryon play Chrono Trigger.

Episode 75 title card.jpg

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Chrono Trigger
Platform SNES
Published Square, 1995
Hosts Felicia Day
Ryon Day
Director of cinematography Omer Ganai
Executive producers Felicia Day
Sheri Bryant
Editing Aline Oliviera
Graphics Natalia Daniels
Music Jason Charles Miller
Production assistant Zach Donohue
David Portner
Gaffer David Thompson
Production designer Stephanie Hass
Makeup Cat Paschen
Line producer Clay Reed
Production coordinator Nick Appelbaum
Stats (as of January 12, 2020)
First aired January 5, 2015
Duration 15:33
Views 135,647
Likes 2,800
Comments 310


Felicia, in posh accent: "Oh hey guys."

Ryon: "Hey guys."

Felicia: "We were just talking about our ascots. How do you not be an ass in an ascot? Ha ha ha."

Ryon: "Ha ha ha, droll. Very droll, Buffy."

Ryon: "This is the 800-pound gorilla of classic Super NES JRPGs."

Felicia: "You're gonna start a— No. You're gonna start a tussle in the comments if you say—"

Ryon: "Where does Chrono Trigger sleep? Anywhere it wants to."

Felicia: "Um, okay, first of all, the graphics on this are amazing. I love—"

Ryon: "This is so much better than the N64."

Felicia: "Any day of the week."

Ryon: "Any day of the week over N64."

Felicia: "Well, there's nothing worse than like the puberty of gaming, which is basically N64 graphics."

Ryon: "Yup. Your balls are droppin', you have low polygon counts, your balls dropping, your voice is changing, you know."

Felicia: "Yeah, it's not a good time to be on camera for anything."

Ryon: "Your polygon count's low, you get hair in weird places."

Ryon, singing: "A to the N to the U to the double S, Anuss! A to the N to the U to the double S, Anuss!"

Ryon: "He's got dreads, dude. Anuss has got it going on."

Felicia: "That's a Carrot Top head if I've ever seen one."

Ryon: "It looks like Sideshow Bob's sleeping in his bed."

Ryon, singing: "N to the Y to the double P S, that's Nypps, that's Nypps!"

Felicia: "Thank you to whoever in the Twitch chat who gave me that. I mean, I'm still a Peupie, but Nypps is kind of—"

Ryon: "You're still a Peupie girl, but Nypps are close to your heart."

Felicia: "Where is the fair? Where is the fucking fair?"

Ryon: "The bright, festive looking place, dude, like every fair is."

Felicia: "I thought it was a playground."

Ryon: "With the exception of those like traveling fairs with the really dangerous rides that show up in parking lots and vanish."

Felicia: "Oh! Part of me wants to always go to those and just tempt fate."

Ryon, reading: "'Um, Vajin! And you're? Anuss.' Vajin and Anuss, close to each other at last."

Vajin's dialog: "Vajin: Hold your horses! I want to get some candy!"

Felicia: "I don't wanna get candy!"

Ryon: "Yeah, let's ditch her. Let's ditch her."

Felicia: "Oh god. I'm gonna drag you by the arm like some kidnapper."

Ryon: "Wow, don't be rough with her, dude. Jesus."

Felicia: "Goddamn, get your candy, bitch! Get it!"

Felicia, reading: "'…you'll get teleported—' Really!? This is not something I would trust at a fair. I'm sorry. When you're talking about scrambling my atoms and teleporting them across the room?"

Ryon: "I know, like, this fly-by-night like fair. They like set up in the dead of night and they leave in the dead of night, and it's like, 'Come teleport!'"

Ryon, reading: "'Check out that hair.' He must be Bob Marley. 'Bob Marley's here, guys!' [singing] We jammin', we jammin', hope you like jammin' too. We jammin', we jammin', playin' Chrono Trigger too."

Felicia, reading: "'Giggle'? She literally says it like this. Giggle."

Ryon: "Oh man, look at him rip off those clothes! [Leene disappears] Oh. Alright. Bye."

Felicia: "Um, you're gonna be accused of murder."

Ryon: "Yeah, congrats. You just murdered the queen. You better fucking peace out. I'm gonna peace out right now. I'm gonna go peace out."

Felicia: "Um, I would jump out that tiny window."

Ryon: "Yeah, can I squeeze through there? No, we're fucked, dude. We're fucked with a capital F. Alright. [passing by people in hall] 'Oh, no, how should I know where the queen went? Yeah, she's resting. She's resting comfortablyyyy!'"

Ryon: "Wait wait, that means that she's her own great, great, great grandmother, right?"

Felicia: "Yeah. That is what we're doing. You are literally— You could write this game."

Ryon, singing: "Here's the story of three lovely ladies who were somehow their own ancestors in the past."

Ryon: "Oh no, those aren't nuns! God, it's the Spice Girls."

Felicia: "God, those nuns! And you know, there is a Chrono Trigger porn where you get to have sex with those nuns."

Ryon: "Chrono Trigger? What's it called?"

Felicia: "Crank my Trigger."

Ryon: "Nypps and Smegz and Anuss and Vajin."

Ryon: "Oh, 'slurp.' I will slurp the shit out of you."

Felicia: "You need to slurp Nypps. You need to slurp Nypps. It's a healing spell."

Ryon: "What? Why am I sucking my own ally off?"

Ryon, singing: "It's boss fight, boss fight, gettin' down for boss fight."

Felicia, as Vajin: "It was awful! 'Cold, dark, and lonely.' It was like being poor!"

Felicia, reading Vajin's dialog: "'Why don't you come home with me?' Hell yeah!"

Ryon: "Alright, sure! DTF! Come on!"

Character names

  • Crono: "Anuss"
  • Lucca: "Nypps"
  • Marle: "Vajin"
  • Frog: "Smegz"


Ryon: "10 nasty frog tongues"

Felicia: "an Oscar"

Cue points

0:00 "This week" preview
0:10 Opening theme
0:18 Host intro
1:02 Game begins
3:50 "Olympic Moment of the Week"
15:12 Rating and outro
15:21 End card/promo
15:32 Closing theme
15:33 End video


External links


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